so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
