PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
they need to just BURY HIM!
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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