awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
