Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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