Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
