Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
