If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
