I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
