Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
