Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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