I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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