Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
