I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
