I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
babies were throwing up all over the place
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
