Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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