Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
This house was built for laser tag.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
my liver is dry heaving
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
