Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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