How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
