I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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