Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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