dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
