Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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