Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize