i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize