There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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