Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
