I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
