Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
