I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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