ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
