I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
