Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
