Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
