Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
