You work out of a Hotel?
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
