that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
