I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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