your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
