we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize