Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Thank you for not boning my boss.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
