im so drunk with asians
where?
always
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
