At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
