well I can't set my house on fire every night
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I could fuck to npr.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
