New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
