Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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