I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
