i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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