I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
