Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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