The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
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