We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
