Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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