Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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