Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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